Today is Christmas day. My heart is fully drawn out to my Savior, Jesus Christ. this is the day we celebrate His birth and also express our love and appreciation for our family members and loved ones.
I want to take this time to express my love for the two most important people in my life: my son and my mother.
Mom, I know I wasn't able to tell you today that I wish you a Merry Christmas. I was unable to tell you how much I love you and miss you. But, I trust that you DO know that I love you so much. You are an angel in my life, and it always pains me to know that my being in prison causes you so much pain. If I had the world, I would give it to you and it still would not be enough to be deserving of you. Every single thing about you is an example to me. I cherish every smile I see on your face and it is my sole wish that you would smile always.
I want you to know that I have found happiness in here. Please know that I have found joy in my Savior. He holds me up and keeps me from drowning in my sorrows. Every single day I am striving to learn more of Him, to be more like Him, to learn more about myself and how I can make sure I never fall from His grace again.
Because of my daily efforts, He has blessed me with the supreme gift, the Holy Ghost. He is my constant companion, and a constant source of wisdom revelation, inspiration, and non-stop comfort and joy. Rejoice, Mom because I am going to be there, beyond the veil, dressed in white. We are an eternal family and we are going to have eternity to bask in each other's company. Today is but a moment. We weep now, but we will cheer in the end. I will never be lost to you again because our Heavenly Father loves us so much. He knows how much we need each other. He knows that this is what I needed to go through. I still have a long way to go, but I am confident that by the time I am released I will have a solid house built on the concrete foundation of Christ.
Briggs, my beautiful son. Oh, how I miss you! My life would not be complete without you in it. You are only 3, but I know that one day these words will reach you. I pray that you will have a testimony of how deeply your earthly father and your Heavenly father love you.
You are always on my mind and close to my heart. I long for the day that I con hold you again and tell you how much I have missed you. I will always be there for you. I will devote my life to you, son. I believe that you deserve more than I can possibly give you. My life is but a small payment in the debt I owe to you.
Trust in God, son. He has saved you for a very special mission. I am going to be there to help you achieve it. That is my mission in life. Please forgive me for choosing myself over you and getting myself locked up for the first ten ears of your life.
I hope you had a wonderful Christmas. My thought and prayers are always with you.
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